Happy Birthday Little Sweetheart

It was two years ago today a little after 8am that you came into this world. I was there by your side when you were born. I had waited by your birth mother all night long holding her hand and comforting her, someone who was mostly a stranger to me yet the women who carried the child who would forever call me mommy. It was one of the most emotional weeks of my life. A whirl wind of fear, unknowns, excitement and more. And there you were born unaware of it all. I didn’t know the outcome at the time, although I wished and hoped and dreamed and prayed that you would be mine forever, but at that moment you were brought into this world I really didn’t know the answers and there were no certainties.

You came out screaming and they passed you to your birth mother, she held you but for a moment and then they took you and cleaned you all up and I watched and cried at how beautiful you were. I didn’t carry you for nine months, I didn’t feel you move inside of me but you had been in my heart all along. Legally you were not mine at that moment, and that scared me, but in my heart you always were and that kept me strong. I took you from the nurses and introduced you to your daddy. He fell madly in love with you the minute he laid eyes on you. You were his beautiful baby girl and you always will be. He hardly ever put you down from that moment on. When he was in the room he had you in his arms, he swaddled you up so cozy and tucked you into the crook of his arm and sat there and watched you.

The days that followed can only be described as the hardest days of our lives yet a time that grew us closer to God and each other more than we could have ever thought possible. I didn’t sleep for four days straight but I stayed strong for you. I held you and fed you and loved on you and prayed and prayed and prayed that we could take you home with us at the end of this journey. I knew that it was not my will but God’s that would keep you in my arms forever. I am a new stronger, braver, happier women because of you and I hope to teach you so much of what I learned as you grow up to be the amazing woman I know you will be.

After waiting and waiting the papers were signed and tears of joy ran like a river! You were ours sweet little girl just as it was meant to be! Phone calls and texts were sent to everyone and the joy of your homecoming was overwhelming!! So many had been waiting to meet you and now they would finally know you how I had known you in my heart for so long. Your brother couldn’t wait to smother you with love and we would finally be a family of four! You were a blessing, a huge blessing, you were meant to be my baby girl, our baby girl. I did not give birth to you but you were chosen to be mine forever. The love that we have for you is so deep and is only growing stronger each day.

Happy Birthday Little Sweetheart we love you to the moon and back and forevermore!